A Welcome Distraction (Kozue)

[\Mai-Dee/ *Erity* ~Kenzi~]

Yuki's reaction brought to mind the last time Kozue had spoken to Genji on any kind of positive terms and afterward when her current company's older brother- and her fiance- had the outburst that had given the Countess such an insight into his character. Their family was one of great swordsmen and women going far back into history, and as such it was rich in tradition and probably more than a few secrets as well; still, it was always a little hard to watch someone wrestling with the decision whether or not to trust her.

A small touch of awkwardness came to Kenzi's normally unfettered smile as she took another sip of tea and then glanced down at her own hands which she rested politely in her lap. "I asked your brother to spar with me once and he gave me that same kind of look," she admitted, her tone light though some of those undiscussed matters between the two women still lingered in her voice a bit. "If I'd stayed I'd be your family right now- but then I wouldn't be here with you either. I'm honored you're still open to teaching me, and I swear I won't teach them to anyone else without your express permission."

When it came to the rest of the Kazan family there wasn't much she could say that wasn't likely to put her friend into any better of a mood than she was already in. Glancing back up from her lap Kozue gave the older girl a sympathetic look and shook her head slightly. "I'm sorry Kiki, but I haven't heard anything of any other Kazan other than Genji and no one has been trying very hard to find them if there are any alive. So many people are in hiding or cut off all ties, and there's only so much that trickles through." If Yuki had wanted to chance speaking to the council there may have been one of the generals with some spies who could have heard something, but if they hadn't found Yuki herself then they didn't have much to go forward in any direction.

All of this talk was bound to get depressing, and while Yuki seemed to have perked up at the tea the fresh relaxation was also bound to make her feel her exhaustion again once it had worn off. If she was still upset or had too many thoughts swimming she'd be too stubborn to give in to that urge. "But there's you and Genji, and that is still a family. They still live within you, and when you follow the life you've chosen they show themselves in your actions. When you have children or take students under your wing they'll be part of your family too. Besides, who would you call a sister if not me?"

[Yukiko]

Yukiko gave a short bark of a laugh. “To my grandfather, family by marriage was hardly family at all. Of course, he was a psychotic old fart who was so militantly old-school it probably got him killed.” She gave Kozue a wry smile. “I’ll always consider you family, but the rest of the Kazans were generally pretty prudish about marrying outside the clan. That’s part of why there was a lot of tension between us and the rest. Though Genji seemed to agree with them about the whole secretiveness thing...”

She looked back down again. “I appreciate that, though,” she murmured. And she really did. It took a massive weight off her shoulders, in fact. She knew her friend would never betray her secrets. Kozue had held her silence for over 11 years, hadn't she? It even made what Kozue said next a little easier to bear. Especially since she'd already figured that would be the case.

“I’m not surprised. Disappointed, but surprised.” She sighed heavily before finishing the last of her tea. She stared at the empty cup in silence. Her family had strongly supported the Fire Lord, after all. She could just imagine them rushing to his defense, to a man - and being slaughtered from the very oldest to the very youngest for it. And the only reason she and Genji had escaped that fate was because they had sought freedom from the stifling of their father's family. If their personalities had been even slightly different, would either be alive today? She gave a quiet scoff. She really needed to stop with these useless speculations. It wasn't doing her any good, after all.

She rose and poured herself some more tea. Without conscious thought, she mimicked Kozue's earlier movements as she tipped the pot. It was something she hadn't done in several years. There was simply no need for such an elegant and traditional style in a little village like hers. She set the pot down delicately and lifted her cup once more. After taking another sip, she looked down at Kozue. “Ya know...I’ve missed talking to you. You’re the balm my mind has been seeking the past few days.” She gave Kozue a gentle smile, her normally neutral eyes soft and expressive. A wonderful warmth was spreading throughout her body just by being with her old friend. No matter what dark place she was in, Kozue had always been the bright warm light of a summer sun. It was a greater comfort than even the tea.

[\Mai-Dee/ *Erity* ~Kenzi~]

There wasn't much that phased Yuki, and now that she seemed to have steadied herself even the news that all of her family but herself and Genji could be dead was just another fact of life to accept and move on from. Hopefully one day Kozue would have that same kind of thick-skinned survival mechanism. She may not have liked her family a good deal but they were still her blood and they'd done their best to keep their ideals alive, even if they were the wrong ones. Though past the age where many here had started killing the Countess still had the luxury of idealism to keep her going rather than the sheer stubbornness of angry despair. It wasn't something she was looking forward to losing.

"I'm glad I could be here for you, my friend," she replied, pushing away the darker thoughts that threatened to loom in on her. Right now Kiki didn't need pragmatism- after all, she had that herself in abundance. What she wasn't able to do for herself was reassure that all of this would be for the best in the end, and that the world was naturally turned toward good rather than evil. After all, if this wasn't the case why would there be an Avatar to balance things out? "If you ever want to talk you know that I'm here, and there's nothing I won't listen to." That hadn't changed between them, even after all of these years of silence.

After taking the last sip from her cup Kozue refilled her own tea, leaving only enough for another couple servings in the pot itself. After that there would be only bitter dregs left. One of the generals at home often said that life was the same way, a thought that the younger Firebender didn't find comforting in the slightest. "I know there's a reason you don't want to sleep, but I can't figure out why. Do you maybe want to talk about that?" she suggested delicately to her friend before taking another sip and carefully monitoring her friend just in case something was wrong.

[Yukiko]

Yukiko's smile widened slightly at Kozue's assurance. She knew her friend would be ready and willing to listen to whatever she had to say. It was just...difficult to say some things. For all that she could put others at ease with simple conversation - earning their trust in the process - she was always troubled when it came to revealing anything about herself. This was particularly true of anything that could be perceived as weakness. That was just her nature and her upbringing had certainly driven similar lessons home to her. “Let the whole world trust you, Yukiko. But never trust another person.” Her mother's words sounded loudly in her mind as Kozue delicately asked what was troubling Yukiko.

With a heavy sigh, she carefully sat back down on her cot and stared at the floor. Frankly, she wasn't really up to reliving that whole mess. The memories terrified in her ways she could probably never explain. She sighed. If she couldn't tell Kozue about it, who on earth could she tell? She probably wouldn't even be willing to tell Hayato about it. He was the piece of peaceful heaven she had in this life. To air her dirty laundry, as it were, to him would be...an unspeakable sin to her. She had no right to corrupt him like that. It was bad enough he knew she killed for her real living. He didn't need to know the sordid details. But Kozue? She was here. She had surely had similar experiences in her time here. So she set her mother's advice aside and once more trusted Kozue with secrets she would've gladly gone to the grave never sharing.

Keeping her eyes on the floor, Yukiko spoke. “I’m...not quite sure how to say it.” Her voice was little more than a whisper, barely audible to her own ears. She cleared her throat before continuing, her voice a bit stronger but still only a murmur. “It’s...these demons. These things that are nightmares given flesh and life breathed into them. I had to fight some on my way up here...but even so. That fight a few days ago...the one Grand Master Kartha led us on...that was...the most horrifying experience I’ve ever had.” Her hands trembled as she spoke, the cup threatening to fall and shatter against the ground - much like her sanity at the moment. “It was...slaughter. And we weren’t even the ones doing the slaughtering at first! It was a fucking miracle any of us survived, let alone made it back! And now...now! Now all I can see is that battle! Men ripped to shreds right before my eyes, demons surrounding us...Hotaka’s screams meshing with the screams of the dying...that ravine was a slaughterhouse and we were the mindless sheep that walked right into it...” Her voice faded into nothing as her eyes became distant. In some small part of her mind, she genuinely hoped talking about it with Kozue would purge her of her terror. The rest was consumed with the images that had, thus far, only haunted her sleep.

[\Mai-Dee/ *Erity* ~Kenzi~]

It was hard to hear that her friend had gone through such hardship, especially when there was some way that Kenzi's presence could have possibly averted that kind of hardship. Yuki was a strong fighter, and Hotaka was her most loyal pet and companion, but there were always more monsters than the defenders could handle and another set of hands was often the difference between life and death. In fact it seemed like they were luck to get out of the battle when they did, and the younger girl's expression held the full measure of her compassion in that realization. If she'd lost her only friend, her 'sister', then the world here would have been a far darker place.

Reaching out a hand she helped Yuki steady her cup with a gentle touch, careful not to alarm her friend with the movement so neither of them would get burned by the glass being thrown or dropped onto the ground beneath them. "It sounds like you had a hard time of it out there- but in the end you made it out. You survived, and so did Hotaka. I know it's hard, and you may not think you can get through this, but I know you can and I'm here to help you with whatever you need. That's what friends- and family- do, isn't it?"

The Countess meant every word and there was virtually no circumstance that could have made her leave Kiki at that point. She needed calm, rest and probably food- and her Hayato wasn't here to look after her, so who else would? "I'm going to be watching out for you, so there's no need for you to fret or argue about it," she told the older girl in a firm but pleasant tone, meeting her gaze and cocking her head slightly as she waited for Yuki to either put up a weak fight or give in. Either response wasn't likely to change her plan. "You won't have to worry about sleeping since I'm here to look out for you and Hotaka."

[Yukiko]

Yukiko didn't notice the gentle hand steadying her cup. The words of comfort barely registered with her. She had always been the type of person to get caught up in events long since passed. Now was a bad time for this tendency to take hold. But she really couldn't help it. Old habits die hard and all that jazz. Her face contracted into a deep frown as she caught the last of Kozue's words. Look out for me? For Hotaka? I don't need someone to look out for me! I’ve been looking out for myself and Hotaka for the past eleven years. It’s better to depend on no one but myself! ...Isn't it?

The frown turned into a look of puzzlement. Wasn’t it? If you depended only upon yourself, you could never be abandoned. Your heart couldn’t break when you lost someone you loved. But...didn’t she depend on Hayato? Wasn’t he the stones surrounding her fire, keeping her from burning out of control? And Hotaka. Didn’t she depend on him, too? And he was so like another human being, she sometimes forgot he was an eel hound! She’d been the most content between missions - when it was lazy summer days, laying beneath the willow with Hayato, Hotaka dozing beside them. By herself - just her and Hotaka - hadn’t she been miserable? Lost and out of place wherever she went.

Yukiko shifted her gaze to meet Kozue’s. It was rather hypocritical of her to think like that. She’d divulged so much in just the past few moments because she trusted Kozue. She trusted the closest thing she’d ever had to a sister. She trusted that the younger woman would help make things okay. To trust someone was to depend on them, if only a bit. Her expression and voice remained neutral as she spoke at last. “Thank you.” She looked down at her cup, finally noticing Kozue’s hand supporting her own. She silently pulled away from the touch, but only to lean around her friend and set the cup on the table. As she sat back on the cot, another wave of weariness slammed into her. For a brief moment, she fought it. But only for a moment. In the next, she slumped a bit before swinging her legs up and curling up on her side. As her eyes closed and sleep descended, she murmured sleepily, “I trust you, Zu-se.”

[\Mai-Dee/ *Erity* ~Kenzi~]

It was good that her friend was finally feeling well enough to relax and see some sense about her sleep. Smiling slightly she straightened up the cups and teapot where the rested, fully ready to sit by her friend's bedside to make sure that she made it through the night. What more could she possibly do to try and sweeten her friend's dreams? Right now it was simply a waiting game. If she awoke, Kenzi would calm her and get her back to sleep as quickly as possible while reassuring her. That's what made them friends, and even family- the willingness to comfort each other when times were bad and celebrate together when times were good.

"I trust you to, and you'll be alright,"[/b] She assured Yuki, settling a blanket over her shoulders and then beginning with the tidying up quietly but more in earnest. If nothing else the older woman would probably find those sounds comfortingly familiar. It would remind her of the peaceful times in her home with her Hayato when the world could be far away. Kozue thought it would be nice to have memories like that to fall back on. For now, Yuki would sleep, and hopefully have no dreams at all. She needed the rest.[/color]

FINISHED