A Welcome Distraction (Kozue)

[Yukiko]

Yukiko wandered aimlessly through the crowded market of the Bulwark. Her eyes were slightly glazed from the exhaustion that threatened to collapse her at any moment. She hadn’t rested for more than a few moments since returning from the ambush nearly a week ago. At first, she’d been busy helping with the wounded they had managed to bring back. But that had only been the first three days. Then she had passed out from fatigue. But that hadn’t lasted long. Within the first hour of having fallen asleep she had wrenched herself awake - with a barely contained scream desperately trying to escape her lips. Since then, she had done everything to stay awake. Every single time she feel asleep, she relived the ambush. Relived every terrifying, sickening moment of it. She had come to dread sleep like she never had before.

Which was why she was now staggering through the crowds. Here, she was less likely to settle and fall asleep. But she knew, feared, that she wouldn’t be able to keep it up much longer. Her eyes itched with sleep and her body ached. She was certain delirium would begin to set in if she didn’t sleep soon. Maybe this time...the dreams won’t come...this time the demons will stay away, she thought bleakly. She stopped by one of the more permanent shops - one that was in an actual building - and leaned against one of its sturdy poles. Her whole body trembled now that she had stopped moving. How much more of this can I take? she thought, her eyes closed in hopeless exhaustion. When will my body finally give out?

[\Mai-Dee/ *Erity* ~Kenzi~]

It had been easier for Kozue to settle into the routine of the Bulwark than she'd expected- but only because she wasn't the sort to complain or think about what she didn't have, and instead worked on solutions for whatever she could. There were always the lost souls from the Spirit Rift to fight, or a group of guards to join, and when that wasn't necessary more training or meeting with those who didn't mind a little conversation. With her skill for Firebending and swordsmanship and distinct lack of desire to show off there were a few who wanted lessons and that suited her just fine. Even her persona was growing easier to carry and required less thought now that it was completely fleshed out.

There was something of a market, which wasn't that much of a surprise. People still had to buy necessities, repair weapons, eat, restock supplies, and sometimes indulge in a few rare hobbies that required specialized equipment. It was something like that which had drawn Kenzi from her usual place to this area; rumors said that every so often people would sell older books, and while it wasn't exactly an addiction she was happier with something leather-bound and filled with ink-covered pages nearby. Smiling and confident as always she walked between the groups of people, looking for something new to read.

A bit of movement in the corner of her eyes drew the Firebender's attention and she turned just in time to see Yukiko lean against a wall, face ashen and eyes sunken. Since she'd left her old friends home after their reunion they hadn't seen each other; it had simply seen like a wiser course to meet again when it was clear whether or not they were under scrutiny. Now it seemed that they were both somewhat accepted, or at least unnoticed, and that was enough for Kozue. Especially since her friend seemed to be having such a rough time.

Smiling slightly she moved closer to the building against which Yuki was resting, careful not to be too quiet in case she alarmed the older woman. She was a skilled fighter in her own right and if she had to defend herself that would cause a lot more attention. "Hello again," she said in a soothing and gentle tone, modulating her voice so it didn't carry too far into the crowd. "You look really tired, is something wrong?"

[Yukiko]

It was a testament to her exhaustion that Yukiko didn't even notice someone's approach. If it had been an assassin, she surely would be dead right now. Frankly, she was at the point where she just didn't give a damn anymore. I should've...died...in that ambush. I’m not...skilled...barely intermediate. How I survived...beyond me. Luck...curse...who knows... It was with a vague curiosity that Yukiko noticed how sluggish her thoughts were. Any moment now, she’d blackout. She could feel the numbing horror of it deep in her bones.

She was drawn from her morbid musings by a gentle tone. She didn’t immediately recognize the voice, she was so far gone. But it pulled at her attention until she opened her eyes. Because she was slumped against the pole, her first view of the person beside her was of a pale neck. Just beyond the neck was long hair of a unique shade. Like...mahogany? She blinked in confusion. How many people did she know with mahogany hair? Just one. Her eyes slowly traveled upward to meet bright, concerned eyes of an equally unique coloration. It was all the confirmation she needed.

“Zu-se?” That was all she had time to say. One moment, she was staring into those violet eyes that had always shone with compassion towards her. The next, she saw nothing but blackness as her body finally gave out. As if from a great distance, she knew she had collapsed against Kozue - but she only felt a numb terror as she descended into unconsciousness. Let the nightmare begin.

[\Mai-Dee/ *Erity* ~Kenzi~]

The moment that Yuki opened her eyes and Kozue saw the expression in them, then heard the broken anguish in her voice as Yuki used that dangerous nickname that something certainly wasn't right. Kenzi had never really seen her friend break down, not even with the death of her family as they passed, one by one, or when Genji had left with little explanation. Those things she had borne with stoicism and determination to keep pushing on, though inwardly the pain must have been huge. Yukiko was nothing if not focused. But now..

b]"Kiki.. What-?" as all the Firebender had time to get out before her oldest remaining friend fell against her, completely limp and eyes closed. She was passed out cold, and seemingly from exhaustion, but Kozue managed to catch the woman and lean her against her shoulder to keep her from falling to the ground and possibly hurting herself. Where was Hotaku or Hayato? Not nearby or surely they would have come running to Yuki's aid. Those two were experts at getting the slightly older woman to look after herself even when she would stubbornly refuse. Her friend's man may have stayed in his village keeping their home- but what of the eel-hound?

There didn't seem to be any other choice but to deal with what was currently in front of her. She was strong enough to hold up Kiki's relaxed weight, but not to carry her home, and her friend's pride would never let her forgive Kozue if she enlisted help. The best thing would be to wake her up and then help Yuki to her own tent, then force her to get a decent sleep- which the hard ground certainly wouldn't provide. With a gentle but firm motion she lightly shook Yuki's shoulder, ready to stop if the woman startled awake in fear or anger. when you were around people trained to fight and kill that could be a real possibility. "Kiki, wake up," she cajoled in a merry tone, hoping that it would be more recognizable as a peaceful experience than an alarmed voice would. "Come on, time to get in bed before you fall on your face."

[Yukiko]

For the briefest of moments, Yukiko heard and saw nothing. She hadn't descended far enough to see the visions of the ambush yet. But neither was she aware enough to notice what was going on around her. She reveled in this moment of peace, desperately wishing for it to last. A moment where nothing existed and nothing hurt - that's all she really wanted right now. All too soon, though, the first wave of images began. She felt creeping horror sweep through her, turning her blood to ice and stopping her heart for just a moment. But before it could really get going, she felt something shaking her lightly and a distant voice calling to her. Her face frowned involuntarily as it tried to place the voice in the chaos of her mind. Is it...who...huh?

The confusion was enough to wake her, but not before one final image blazed in her mind’s eye: Hotaka’s shrieks of pain as a demon began tearing into him. Her eyes flared open, panic and fury tangled together within their depths. With a last surge of strength she didn’t think she had, Yukiko shoved herself away from Kozue. She didn’t recognize her surroundings at first. All she could see and hear was Hotaka and a scream started working its way up her throat as her lips curled into a snarl. She pressed her back hard against the pole she’d previously leaned upon, the stance of cornered, feral animal. For several moments she remained like that, her breath hard and fast as a short burst of adrenaline shot her body into overdrive. And then it passed and she relaxed.

She rubbed her face with her hands, trying to rid herself of what she’d just seen. After another moment, she looked at Kozue. “Bed...? Uh...right...bed. Tent’s...somewhere...that way...” She gestured vaguely to her left. She looked in the direction she’d indicated, her face scrunched in a confused frown. Why am I...going...to bed? Isn’t that...something...to avoid?

“I think...I’m gonna need...help...Ko-...er, Kenzi.” Her frown deepened. She really couldn’t think straight at all right now. She shoved off the post, staggered a bit as she tried to regain balance, and then leaned heavily against Kozue. “‘S about...ten minutes this way...patched-together tent by the largest mess hall...Hotaka’s probly...by it...”

[\Mai-Dee/ *Erity* ~Kenzi~]

Evidently whatever haunted Yuki in her sleep was very quick to strike, for in the few short minutes it took Kozue to make the attempt to wake her up the woman was in genuine fear and rage. Her actions, from pushing away to taking a defensive stance with a silent growl, all while incoherent, was a very clear sign of that. Rather than trying to approach again and take the chance of panicking her friend more the Countess stood back and watched in a worried fashion, glancing around to see if there was anyone who was going to be foolish enough to step forward and try to get involved. Probably the person would have had the best of intentions, but they still would have gotten hurt before Yuki even realized what was going on.

Another minute and the half-conscious woman seemed to be more aware of her surroundings, relaxing again and managing to speak, though it was obvious that there was still a good deal of confusion in her senses. When Yukiko gestured to where she believed her tent to be Kenzi made a mental note of the direction, then stood still to let her friend use her as a balancing point. With the state she was in a fall would have been less than graceful and may have injured one or both of them. And the fact that the proud Kazan assassin and warrior asked for help- this was pretty dire.

"I'll help you. What are friends for?" she asked in a quiet but reassuring tone, nodding at the directions and beginning to take a few careful steps in that direction with one hand around Yuki's shoulders. Some of the others in the area looked a little confused, but Kozue's calm demeanor and smile seemed to reassure them just as much as she hoped it would her old friend and they casually cleared something of a path. Though she was smaller than Yuki the Firebending master was stronger than she appeared and in control of herself; that would help to keep Yuki steady. Now it was just a matter of doing the walking and finding the tent.

[Yukiko]

Although still not fully aware, Yukiko was noticing more of what happened around her. The crowd seemed to be clearing a path as she staggered along towards her tent with Kozue's help. She felt a twinge of gratitude, recognizing several of the people in the crowd. They were other survivors, mostly, and they definitely understood why she was in her current state. A few even moved ahead to help make way for her and Kozue. “We always rec’nize each other,” she slurred. “Always...” She said nothing more, instead focusing on guiding Kozue back to her tent. It took a bit, but by nudging her along - though it was probably more like shoving than nudging - they eventually arrived at Yukiko's patchwork tent. It was something she had put together over the course of two sleepless days and nights because she could no longer stand sleeping beneath the stars - could not tolerate having no barrier between herself and the outside world. Despite being a hodge-podge of fabrics supported by four unfinished pieces of wood, one could still see the superb stitching that had been put into it. Oddly, it was some of her better patchwork.

“This’s it,” she managed to say, though she wasn't sure if Kozue had heard her. Of course, her friend probably didn't need the confirmation since Hotaka was stretched out beside the tent. The aging hound lifted his head wearily to eye the approaching pair. The trunk of his body was still bound with bandages, as were his left foreleg, tail, and neck. A newly healed scar ran down the front of his face now, courtesy of a demon's claws. His tail hit the ground weakly and he winced slightly, but persisted nonetheless. Sorrow filled her eyes as she gently pushed away from Kozue and staggered over to her oldest and closest friend. She sank to her knees and gently hugged him round the neck, crooning softly to him, “I’m sorry, Hotaka. Never again, promise.” She barely noticed how broken her voice sounded, barely noticed how vulnerable she was right now. She felt the gentle rumbling of pleasure in his chest and buried her head in his neck, relishing this small comfort. Distantly, she thought how small and weak she must seem to Kozue.

Yukiko turned to look at her other dear friend. She didn't bother trying to hide how weary and upset she was. She probably wouldn't have succeeded in hiding it, anyway. She gave her a weak grin that was more of a grimace. “Welcome to my lovely abode.”

[\Mai-Dee/ *Erity* ~Kenzi~]

The statement about recognizing each other brought a small smile to Kozue's face as she concentrated on getting the two of them to where Yuki could rest. It was unsettling to know that such a strong person could be so shaken by the things that happened here- but Kozue was far from disillusioned. Having a bad experience didn't make you weak, and reacting to it didn't make you useless. Those were things humans did. I suppose that's one way that Yuki was more lucky than Genji. She can show these things.

It was easy enough to recognize Yuki's tent, especially when you knew the eel-hound outside of it as well as Kenzi did- but seeing the creature so wounded was a sad moment indeed. As much as it affected her though, it obviously hurt and demoralized Yukiko more, and she almost seemed ready to cry as she hugged her aging pet. This is what war was. Maybe some were too jaded or cruel to cry or show grief, but it was still there, and just as the generals-turned-philosophers had predicted, no book could ever fully encompass what that meant.

She could only look on with compassion as she waited for the tearful moment of closeness continued, then smiled reassuringly, her demeanor calm and sympathetic. Her friend was generally proud and determined, completely focused and unwavering- but when she wasn't she still didn't like it brought up. Yuki was ready to talk, but it would have to be a gentle process, unrushed and comfortable. "It looks like your sewing's gotten better," she replied, looking at the colorful drape of fabrics and running a finger along a silken portion. "C'mon, let's get you inside. I'll make some tea."

With a graceful motion Kozue moved aside the tent flap to let her weary friend inside, hoping that it would delay any objections. Sometimes her stubborn friend had a hard time accepting help, but it really was in her best interest this time.

[Yukiko]

“Tea...huh? I think...that sounds wonderful.” Yukiko rose slowly, wincing slightly as the stitching in her thigh wound stretched painfully. She stretched once she had straightened up - she knew it would get blood flow going again. That would help her stay awake a little while longer. She nodded to Kozue and ducked beneath the flap into the tent. She stepped to the side to allow Kozue to enter. Moving further into the tent, she settled gingerly onto the cot she had managed to scrounge up. It was actually the most recent acquisition of her hodge-podge collection of furniture. The other pieces included a small table, a chair, and an old chest that held her medical equipment. Thrown in the corner was her well-worn travel pack along with another sack filled with cooking utensils. They were mostly used for her poultices and unguents, but she also used them when she didn’t feel like eating in the mess or at the shops in the market.

Leaning against the tent at the head of the cot was her blade, Kano. It was sheathed at the moment, but only because she was awake and didn't want to hurt someone with it. That would change if she fell asleep - particularly if Kozue wasn't here. She rubbed her face again. “Everything you’ll need for tea is in the sack by my pack. There’s a couple of pouches full of water behind the pack. I think there’s even tea leaves in there, too.” She closed her eyes as she said this and bowed her head in exhaustion. She really wanted to sleep - and feared it too much to.

[\Mai-Dee/ *Erity* ~Kenzi~]

At least Yuki was too tired to put up much of a protest- and while that was a very bad sign of her mental state, it did make it easier to help her without a constant argument about whether or not she needed the help. Kozue's oldest friend was like a sister to her, but even she had to admit that the older woman could be exceptionally stubborn from time to time. Of course, if she wasn't she wouldn't have been Kiki either, and there was no reason for her to change her nature so drastically. How else would Kenzi have been able to tell something was wrong?

A quick glance around told Kenzi the basic layout of the tent and she listened closely to the instructions she was given, moving gracefully around the few pieces of furniture in the space and going to the indicated spot to find the tea-leaves and set them within easy reach. Once the teapot was full a bit of concentration and a steady breath over the outside of the vessel had the water boiling and she dropped in a few of the strongly-smelling leaves before replacing the lid and setting the teapot aside.

"Now, we'll just let that steep," Kozue said in a pleasant tone, looking around for the teacups and pulling them out to rest besides the resting teapot. "Why don't you lay down and rest for a few minutes while there's nothing to do by wait? You do seem a little bit tired." Perhaps that was too gentle of a way to put it, but it was hard for the Countess to be blunt when life and death wasn't on the line. With as tired as Yuki was she may be asleep as soon as she hit the pillow if she took her advice- and if not she'd probably have to talk to keep herself awake, which would also do her some good.

[Yukiko]

With great effort, Yukiko lifted her head to watch Kozue blow on the teapot. She was mildly curious about this until she heard the kettle whistling slightly. Her eyes widened. Was little Kozue really a Master Firebender? At this young age? She’d been shocked back in the village to see that Kozue was at the advanced level! It was actually rather embarrassing. She’d once helped this young woman train as a beginner. And now she’d been surpassed. She really had neglected her bending in favor of the shadowy world of assassination.

The revelation was briefly pushed aside when Kozue mentioned resting. “No.” Strength returned to her voice. She was definitely not going back to sleep so soon. She gave Kozue a hard look. After seeing how Yukiko had reacted the first time she’d passed out, how on earth could Kozue even think of mentioning rest? “Absolutely not.” That was the end of it as far as she was concerned. Her eyes dropped to the floor again and she began to chew on her lower lip in thought. Her voice became plaintive and curious. “Say...Kenzi...when did you learn to do that? The whole...heating things with breath...thing. That’s a Master technique, isn’t it?”

[\Mai-Dee/ *Erity* ~Kenzi~]

So she didn't want to sleep, but she wanted the tea- and seemed pretty insistent on her viewpoint too. Stubborn Yuki, just like always. At least the comfortable surroundings and the quiet seemed to have improved her mood a bit, though most other people would have thought it had worsened. The older woman had never reacted in the ways most people expected her to- but that was her, and to see her near tears had been far more disconcerting than the harsh edge to her voice was. To Kenzi it meant that her friend was collecting her senses, and it would probably be a lot easier to get something understandable out of her.

The question Yukiko posed was almost child-like, but not in a negative way; had she really not realized during her time at her home before that she'd improved that much? Then again she tended not to use any more of her skill than she had to in order to accomplish a goal, and there was always her friend's pride to consider, so she'd kept herself restrained in their sparring sessions. "Oh, yeah it is," she replied with a cheerful smile as she turned and sat on the chair, waiting for the hot water to leech all of the flavors out of the leaves she'd added. "There wasn't much to do at- home- except to read and train, and that was always what I enjoyed in my free time anyway, so I just did that for a few years."

The tent wasn't terribly large so it wasn't hard for the Firebender to reach over and pick up the cups from where they rested and set them onto a nearby table. She'd always had good manners and a decent sense of decorum, but the constant eyes of the traditionalists among her relatives had made the most formal ways of doing things like serving tea far more natural than the casual ones. Without even realizing it she held her arms just so to show the delicate angle of them as she picked up the teapot, checked the contents and then poured both cups, starting with the one closest to Yuki. "Drink up. I think it'll help."

[Yukiko]

Watching Kozue serve tea was a tsunami of nostalgia that Yukiko could’ve done without. She hadn’t seen anyone do such a simple task with such dignity and grace since she had left the Fire Nation 11 years ago. It reminded her, not of her father’s sisters, but of her mother. Her mother, who had always had the elegance of a swiftly-flowing stream and the overwhelming beauty of a thundering waterfall, had shown more skill in pouring tea than any in her father’s family. It was a painful thing to think about just now - yet oddly comforting, as well. Something of her old life still existed, after all, even if it had changed in many other ways.

Half-rising from her cot, Yukiko leaned over and grasped the teacup with both hands. She very nearly fell over in the attempt, but managed to catch herself. All without spilling the tea either. She was getting better at functioning with an exhausted body. Whether that was something to be impressed by or not was another matter entirely. She quickly sat back down and inhaled the fragrant steam rising from the cup. It wasn't oolong this time; that was incredibly hard to come by in the Bulwark. It was a simple green tea, but it was a comfort nonetheless. She took a sip, savoring the slightly bitter flavor of the unsweetened tea. “I guess I should’ve assumed that. You always did love training your Firebending. And I’ll bet you came across a lot of obscure techniques while inhaling all those books of yours.” She lifted her gaze to meet Kozue's, a hint of playfulness managing to shine in her eyes as a faint smile crossed her face. Her eyes dropped to the floor as she fell into thought. “Me, I haven’t made much headway with either. I know enough to kill my targets with relative ease. That’s about it,” she continued, more to herself than to her friend. Her expression wasn't sad exactly. More disappointed in having failed to make something truly meaningful of herself. She shook her head to rid herself of those thoughts. She really must be out of it if she was being so depressingly introspective. Still...what had happened to that desire to be a Master?

She looked at Kozue again. “Will you teach me?”

[\Mai-Dee/ *Erity* ~Kenzi~]

There wasn't much that a good cup of tea couldn't do- even give a little comfort to someone who was tired and upset. Kozue could almost watch the tension melt out of Yuki as she inhaled the scent of the simple green tea, brewed to bring out the subtleties of flavor that could be missed if the leaves were kept too hot for too long. Her friend's appreciation brought a smile to the Firebender's face as she set aside the teapot where it could be easily reached but not tipped over and picked up her own cup. It may have been a simple green tea, but common tea with a friend was better than fancy brews with enemies. That was what she'd left behind at home.

The things that Yuki said reminded the younger of much happier days and her smile spread a bit, nodding in agreement and laughing a bit as her friend seemed to brighten even further for the reminiscence. It was comforting to know that she wasn't the only one who could look back at some things and see the good in them. "History books are one thing we managed to get pretty early and I spent a lot of time with them," she admitted freely, her tone cheerful and bright even though she knew that Yuki would still need to sleep sometime. Maybe if she was happier first she wouldn't be so alarmed by whatever was keeping her awake.

When they'd been younger and just made friends Yuki had been a good number of grades above Kozue, and so helped he with some of the more advanced lessons that the younger girl hadn't had much exposure to in her travels- so Yuki asking her the same girl she'd once helped train to return the favor seemed right somehow. There were times in life when coming full circle was completely appropriate. "I'll teach you whatever you'd like to know," she assured the older woman without hesitation, then took a sip of her tea. "will you show me some of your swordwork? I've been working on it as well but I know you always had some tricks up your sleeve."

[Yukiko]

Kozue’s request made Yukiko drop her eyes. It was true she’d sometimes used her family’s techniques when sparring with Kozue. But...those were family techniques. Skills and tricks that had been passed down for countless generations. Things that outsiders were rarely, if ever, taught. She chewed on her lip thoughtfully. They were as much a part of her and her family’s identity as their tradition of forging their own swords. She had a feeling Kozue didn’t quite know what she was asking for. Her friend had always been one to freely give away any and all knowledge she had. Not because she expected anything in return, but because she saw no need to keep things hidden from others. But this wasn’t calligraphy or Firebending - or a myriad of other skill sets, either. It was what had kept the Kazans at the head of the pack for centuries without having to rely on Firebending.

But Yukiko supposed none of that really mattered now. She’d abandoned her family a long time ago. They no longer had a hold over her. And besides, they were dead, weren’t they? Every last one, save for Genji. “Okay,” she said finally. She kept her eyes on the green-tinged tea in her cup. “I’ll show you some of it. Normally, I wouldn’t teach you. It’s strictly against the family’s code of honor to reveal anything about our skills to outsiders. I can’t even remember the last time we allowed it. But it’s really only fair.” She fell silent, swirling her tea slightly. It was only fair. She had learned a long time ago you could never do something for nothing. Karma was never kind if you tried. Still, this was going to be hard. Secrets were always difficult to give away when they were had always been kept, even if out of habit.

It did raise another question in her mind, though. “Ya know...I don’t think I ever asked about my family during your first visit. And aside from Genji, you never mentioned any of them.” She licked her lips, wetting them briefly. “Do you...know what happened to them?”